Unique in all the wrong ways

Ah, Valentines Day--when we all pace the floor trying to come up with gift ideas, and ask ourselves What kind of message is this going to send? If you want any hope of winning someone over, or maintaining the relationship youre already ensconced in, then you better put some thought into this lest you in𓄧cur the wrath of your loved one. But plain old pink and red heart cards are so played out, and he/she/it will think you just stopped caring and took the easy way out.

We dont know which love-themed gift will make you stand out this season--but we do know which hearts you shouldnt send as a present. No matter how clever or cute you think it is, your crush is definitely going to assume youre saying something. Alternatively, if these are the messages you are trying to send, then by all means, go nuts.

Kanos trophy (Mortal Kombat)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Im a serial killer.

Heart of the Chosen (Darksiders)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I need y🧜ou... and three other people 🐟before I can get on with my life.

Handyman's power source (BioShock Infinite)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: If Im ever on life support, please kill me.

Astaroth (Soulcalibur)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: It would b💦e such a turn-on ജif your heart was sticking out of your chest, too!

Emperor (The House of the Dead 2)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Im incapable of figuring 🍰out that a bright red circle is your only weak point.

Tyrant T-002 (Resident Evil)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: If youd rather implant your heart next to y💦our armpit, Im cool🦹 with that too.

Health meter (Primal Rage)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: If you reject me, Im going to eℱxplode in a bloody mess. Also, if your name is Chaos, feel free to pee and fart on me.

The Heart (Dishonored)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I enjoy whispering secrets about our relat💮ionshi෴p to masked men.

Roxas (Kingdom Hearts II)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: My heart literally has a mind and life of its own. I hope youre ⛄OK with that.

Ripper Heart (Shadow Warrior)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Im probably a humongous♑ racist, be𒉰cause I bought and played Shadow Warrior.

Mom's heart (Binding of Isaac)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I endorse child abuse, and will gladly lock our sonꦛ in the basement.

Glottis' heart (Grim Fandango)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Youre like my overweight, comic-relief sidekick.

Health (The Darkness)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: If Im ever down and feeling blue, my razor-toothed tentacles will �༒�rip some love out of you.

GUILT-infested heart (Trauma Center)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I think you should go♋ see a doctor. One with the magical powers of The Healing Touch. Also we dont have health insura🌳nce.

Hearts (Castlevania)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: If you find yoursel🐲f incapable of using a weapon, these should come in handy.

Statue of Happiness heart (Grand Theft Auto IV)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Im strongly consider🃏ing chaining you up and impaling you with rebar.

Impaled heart (Path of Exile)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Id rather stab my own heart with a sword and wield it 🐈as a weap✤on than go out with you.

Transplant heart (Surgeon Simulator 2013)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: It is nearly impossible for me to get my han♛ds around you💙. As in, I never developed basic motor skills.

Genie-style heart (Aladdin - Genesis)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I wish you wou♉ld paint your skin blue and grow a goatee.

Life (Splatterhouse)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I would don a mask and kill hundreds of thi🏅ngs to win you🦹 back.

Jenova (Final Fantasy VII)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I want to cultivate your alien power by putting you in a꧒ test tube.

Hearts (Hearts)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Youre o🥂ld, and youre only fun for abou♌t ten minutes.

Weskers heart (Resident Evil 5)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Ill still love you even when youre a mutated, megalom💛aniacal freak.

Heart of Gaia (God of War 3)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I would slash you apa🔯rt for green health orbs without a second thought.

Egg Heart (Sonic the Hedgehog 4: Episode II)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Whenever I face you, Im remind🐈ed of how annoying and anticlimactic you are.

Lava-seared Drakkin Heart (EverQuest)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: Im still addicted to a game ♍I started playing 14 years ago, and I love it way more than Ill ever love you.

Stage 1 boss' heart (Contra 3)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I want to shoot you with m🌠y Spread Gun. ♈That is not a euphemism.

Riftworm heart (Gears of War 2)

Instead of I love you, this heart says: I love yoဣu so much, I want to explore every inch of yourܫ intestines.

Love comes in all shapes and sizes

Will you be professing a warped message of love this Valentine's Day? Let us know in the comments below which freaky video game heart will best win over ꧃the object of your affection. Just make sure you don't say or gift anything that can be used against you in a court of law.

And if you're looking for more lovey-dovey gooeyness, check out the 澳洲幸运5开奖号码历史查询:Top 7 Greatest lovꦡe stories in gaming and 澳洲幸运5开奖号码历史查询:Love thyselꦏf: Narcis♐sistic game characters.