We love horror films.
But sometimes, we think there just aren't enough of them. So, with Halloween approaching, we've decided to celebrat🍬e the horror movie mash-up phenomenon, which turns ordinary films and TV shows into the gore flicks we love.
The best are below. You won't believe how good Mrs Doubtfire looks...
Home Alone
Best Bit In The Trailer: Quiet possibly the build-up. With that𒐪 '80s low-budget horror music and the Carrඣie-esque storyline going on, it's a promising crescendo.
And the climax del🦹ivers. Just🅠 look at his face at 00.47.
We'll never look at Kevin McCallister in tꦉhe same way again.
Best Scene If It Was A Film: It would only take a few minor alterations to turn Home Alone into a Saw -style terror flick.
You've got the psychotic killer, the graphic murder scenes, and above all, some damned cre♔a🗹tive denouements.
We'd like to see one long scene,🏅 a gross-out bloodbath, where a series of booby-traps are set off in the kitchen, triggering flying knives, cheese-wire and toastie-makers.
To be honest, if this was real life, we're sure that the 🌃falling iron would have smashed Marv's scull, and that Harry's brains would be all over the walls after that swinging paint-tin hit.
Oh well. We'll just hav𒁃e to stick 💟to our sketching. Though we have run out of red felt-tip.
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House of 1000 Muppets
Best Bit In The Trailer: By using the soundtrack to House Of 1000 Corpses alongside mashed-up Muppets footage, the geniuses behind this re-cut have birthed a thing of grotesque be🀅auty.
Our favourite bit: Big🀅-Bird's brief cameo as the mysterious hitch-hiker. Ridiculouslꦜy funny.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: Doctor Satan (A.K.A. Dr. Teeth) has Miss Piggy bo𓆏und and gagged and facin༺g the wall.
When she won't stop crying, he gets angry.
Dr. Teeth: Listen you Malibu, middle-class, Barbie piece of sh**, I'm trying to work here! * Removes gag*
Miss Piggy: Where's Kermit? Is he OK?
Dr. Teeth: Let's go see! * Walks over to a curtain*
Behold! * Draws curtain back to reveal Kermit's (perfectly intact) corpse*
FROG BOY!
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Sleepless In Seattle
Best Bit In The Trailer: Well🌳, there doesn't seem to be a concrete plot to this one. There's not even a hint at any gore.
They do manage to m🐻ake the kid nice and creepy, though.
We liked this bit: "There's a lot o🐼f desperate women out there..." and the shot of Meg Ryan's face.
Gutted, Meg.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: The Empire-state building finale - thoug෴h, this time, she doesn't find the kid's rucksack up on the roof.
She finds his head.
When Tom Hanks returns wiꦬth a sack and a meat cleaver, there's a bloody scuffle,♔ and they both end up falling to their deaths.
We're not much into romance.
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(Scary) Mary Poppins
Best Bit In The Trailer: The 💮part where Mary's descending from the sky with the aid of an umbrella.
There's something undeniably disturbing in the steady ine𒁏vitability of her arrival. She appears, eerily, 𝐆from the distance, gradually gliding closer, her figure unchanging.
Whoever thought that up, given the right platform, could have ⛄been a horror genius.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: Th💎e "Spoonful of Sugar" sc🃏ene, where Mary uses her telekinetic powers to tidy the children's bedroom.
Late🉐r that night, the cra🍰nk on the jack-in-the-box keeps turning.
The tune is "Stay Awake", and it's Mary's voice the children can hear, humming th𒀰eꦐ tune.
When the jack finally pops out of his box, a whole load of bloo♐d sprays out, too, covering the kids, who🌟 scream their little eyes out.
It's very cool.
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Uncle Buck
Best Bit In The Trailer: "I don't want him here..." There is real conviction in that woman's voice. It ▨sounds as if sꦛhe's about to cry.
She reaaally doesn't want him here.
The wintry setting is reminiscent of such films as Fargo and The Shining, where bleak and desolate landscapes give a feeling of desperate isolation. Uncle Buck looks a bit like John Wayne Gacy, too.
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: The clown scene.
A clown arrives to entertain the children at Miles (Macaulay Culkin)'s 🥀birthday party. However, the clown doesn't even mak🤪e it into the house.
Bu🌱c𒈔k kills the clown and takes its bloody clothes and mask.
He then entertains the children himself. By chasing them around the house with an axe. Ch🧸oppy choppy!
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Seinfeld
Best Bit In The Trailer: 01:00 - "He's real, but he is not human..."
If you don't know Seinfeld, this could work as a pretty believable trailer to a low-budge🔴t gore-fest🌳.
If you do know Seinfeld, it's a real treat.
The S🌠itcom-to-Horror transition is a tricky one, and is a bit far-fetched at times, but this one ain't too shabby. We're convinced.
Best Scene If It Was A Film: It turns out that Kramer is a homicidal maniac.
He's also a sex🧜ual deviant and kind of cannibalist💟ic.
The proverbial hits the fan when one night he h𝐆as one of his 'episodes' and loses patience wit♍h Newman.
This does not bode well for Newman.
He's hacked to pieces and his body chopped up 🎉into little pieces and kept in the freezer. Kramer claims that Newman moved to France to seek o🐓ut his long-lost family.
Seinfeld is el🙈ated. Until Kramer's next 'episode', that is...
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The Lion King
Best Bit In The Trailer: This was an ambitious one. The Disney horror re-cuts usually look dreadful.
It's surprisingly successful though. A horror movie with lions?! They've got, like, a billion knives in their mouths !
Our favourite bit has got to be the very end. "You made me happy... BOOM !"
Best Scene If It Was A Movie: We like the idea of psycho Simba.
In the real Lion King horror, weꦐ'd expect that he goes off the rails a bit after witnessing the murder of ꦍhis father.
After a stint in the jungle, living feral and alone (he ate Timon and Pumbaa), he returns to Pride Rock. He no longer has the sociꦿal skills to get along with other lions.
He spends most of his time skulking in the shadows, stalking his lif♓elong love, Nala.
T⛄hings turn ugly when she starts getting off with his father's murderer, Scar.
Extreme, unbridled violence ensues.
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Mrs Doubtfire
Best Bit In The Trailer: This is our personal favourite.
There are so many good bits worthy of note: That creepy 'look' at 01.00; the disturbing telephone conversation which switches to reveal Robin Williams s♑itting on his bed; the kids' troubled faces when hꦬis identity is revealed; and the climactic final montage.
It's just so believable. We don't know if we'll ever be able to watch it again (yes, that is a bad thing).
Best Scene If It Was A Film: It's going to have to involve tಞhe children ꧃being kidnapped.
Their mother returns one evening to find bloody footprints in the hallwayℱ.
A trail of blood leads to the back door, where a blood-stained teddy be๊ar has been abandoned on the step of the open door, next to a pair of false teeth.
Yup, it's dark. We want horror Doubtfire!
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